Lessons Learned - Reorgs and Layoffs

I have been through various reorganizations and layoffs. I have been laid off.  I have been moved into new areas without getting a say-so in the change.  I have had executives laid off and had to report to new executives.  I have had to watch friends get moved around to teams they were not crazy about, and some were laid off.  I have had to listen to the calls while supervisors told people they were laid off or changing roles.  I have had to work on the HR reports during the reorgs, knowing how the checks in a column would change people's lives.  I have had to work with executives to determine where the checks should go.

Trust me, there is nothing easy about any of it.  Through all the different phases I have experienced, I have learned a lot.

• It is very hard being the one affected. You feel you have done something wrong and are being punished. It is hard to understand how the "higher ups" could do this to you. 
• It is equally as hard to be the one checking the columns that change people's lives. The "higher ups" know that humans with families, bills and responsibilities are behind each change. They realize that some people really love what they do and took the job because they wanted to work with so-n-so, but that is no longer an option.  The people making decisions feel guilt, frustration and anger along with the affected people.  
  
• If you are "lucky" enough to stay where you are, you suffer from survivor's guilt. You wonder why good people were let go or moved to other areas and you are staying where you are.  You worry they will despise you.
• The uncertainty and stress of it all is unbearable at times. It is hard to stay positive and not get dragged down by overthinking the possibilities.
• There is never a good time or way to process these changes.  If they happen too fast, you feel unprepared.  You feel they rushed the process, and it won't have been truly thought out correctly.  If the changes happen too slowly, you feel the company is hiding something or leaving you in limbo. If they let you know the change in the morning, it hurts because you just started working that day.  If they contact you at the end of the day, you wonder why they made you work all day.  If they immediately let you go, you wonder why they didn't trust you to finish up important work.  If they ask you to stay to complete work, you wonder why they are making you stay.  If it is before a holiday, it ruins your holiday.  If it is after, you feel they should have done it before so you could have known going into the holiday.  It is truly a no-win situation.

I have also learned some positive and helpful lessons - that I use to survive all kinds of life's "tragedies", not just work changes.

• Stay positive. People will notice and respect you for it.
• Don't get involved in the gossip.  It will add extra stress to your world that will not help you.
• Don't create a horrible story in your head to fill the void of information.
• Make a game plan. You will feel better having a plan A, B, and C.
• Take stock of what is important.  If staying is a goal, then work to make that happen. If changing teams would help, try and position yourself to get to that new team.  If leaving would give you peace, ensure that people realize you wish to go. 
• Keep busy. Look for other projects, people or teams to help.  Keeping busy makes the waiting a lot less burdensome.  
• If you forced to change in some manner, realize that the new adventure coming your way will probably be better than where you were.  Embrace the change and learn from it.  
• Have a rainy-day fund.  The peace of mind knowing that money will not be an extra burden during trying times is a godsend.
• Engage your social circle to help keep you grounded.  The distraction of their lives also helps remind you that other things are going on around you and it is not all about the change you are experiencing.
• Keep your ego out of it.  Change is not a personal attack.

Business is business and change is change.  Almost all businesses will reorg and do layoffs at some time or another. Everyone's life faces unexpected changes.  There is no way to escape change, but there is a way to come out the other side in a better place.

I have really only had one change that I felt was truly "wrong". So, I used my plan B and C and made a change that suited me better.  It worked out beautifully. The others changes all seemed hard or somewhat wrong at the time but ended up being positive new adventures. I have been very blessed and I plan to continue to be blessed when the next change comes my way.

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Take your ego out of it

Enjoying Life

Be a tourist in your own town

I enjoy vacations and traveling.  I love getting to see new sites and get my passport stamped. John and I find it thrilling to explore new cities and engage in new adventures.  

Honestly though, we seldom really play tourist in our own town.  Shame on us.  

St Louis and the surrounding area has so much to offer.  We do the occasional zoo day, see a play, walk around Main Street St Charles or visit a new restaurant. But overall, we don't really do all the great touristy things available in our area.  We haven't been the aquarium, some of the wineries, the History Museum, etc.

This year, John suggested that we try and do more tourist things in our town. I am pleased to share that we have already made some progress.  We walked around the Central West End, saw the Van Gogh exhibit, strolled the Delmar Loop and visited the Art Museum. 

We plan to continue the trend and see a lot more of what our city/county has to offer. It is exciting and we are enjoying not only time together but seeing and learning new things.

Added bonus: spending money, locally, can only help the town I call home.

I hope that you are finding a way to enjoy the town you live in.  If you are not taking advantage of your local attractions and helping support the place you call home, I hope this makes you think of doing more around your town.

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Lessons learned from my broken wrist

At the end of March, I fell getting out of the hotel shower while on vacation. I broke my wrist. Luckily, it was my left wrist, as I am right-handed. I always sort of figured my left hand was not as "important". I have been amazed at how many things in this life require two hands.  

I have learned so much during the start of this process.

• Clothing has way too many buttons, zippers, snaps, hooks and laces.  Thank God yoga pants are acceptable these days.
• Laundry is hard to hang up, fold and put away. And laundry baskets are impossible to carry down the stairs. Though dropping the basket down the stairs is easy (but freaks out the cats).
• Tucking socks together to put them in the drawer is tough, but unrolling them and putting them on is even tougher.
• Touch typing is really slow and requires a lot of thought. Apparently as a touch typist, I let my mind/hands just do their job without really thinking of capitalization, spelling, and punctuation. Just typing this blog has taken about ten times the amount of time I would normally spend crafting a post.
• The car's turn signal should be an Alexa option ("Alexa turn on right blinker").
• Lunch salads are impossible. Restaurants serve a ton of food that requires a knife and fork combo. Luckily, the appetizer menus have finger foods. My diet is suffering.
• Short hair is much easier to care for than long hair. But, still tough to color.
• Clipping and filing my fingernails seems so scary I am avoiding it for now and just letting my nails get longer and longer.
• Twisting off beverage lids/caps has me either begging for help, or drinking just water.
• And, last but not least, don't even get me started with going to the bathroom.

Overall, I am finding creative ways to do a lot of things. My husband, friends and family are all super supportive and help when I need it.  Yes, this sucks, but it could have been so much worse.  I feel blessed in ways I never thought of.

I truly have taken my left hand totally for granted.  I will never do that again!

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Life Shapers

Money Well Spent

Who is my client?

When I worked as a waitress, it was easy to know who my client was... it was the patrons.  I lived off tips, so if they were happy, they tipped better, and I made more money.  Certainly, when I owned my own company, customers were my clients.

When I started working in offices, it became much harder to know who my client was.  A few of my first temp jobs were for sales companies.  We all worked to help the salesmen make more sales.  The clients were our customers.  Pleasing them was our main goal. So, that too was pretty easy.  

As I worked for different industries and got further into my admin career, the question of who my client was became harder to understand.  Usually, it was my boss/manager - the one that approved my pay increases and promotions.  Yet, this seemed harder and harder to decipher as my role became office manager / assistant / chief of staff / girl Friday.   Suddenly, I had a lot of bosses and no true "client".  

As I was cross-training to replace a lady who was retiring, she informed me that everyone in the office was my client. If they were all successful in their various roles, then I was successful, and the company was more successful.  It all trickled up and down.  She taught me how to look at them all equally, and prioritize based not only on title, but on necessity and urgency.  It was okay to tell your boss you needed to push their work to another day, if a co-worker's request was more urgent or would affect a greater number of people.   These concepts were very eye opening for me.

Now, I look at everyone as my client. My boss, her boss, their assistants, their project managers, the people in facilities that help keep us all safe and sound, along with all the other people that reach out to me each day.  I do my very best to treat them all as my most important customer - for when the prosper, I can feel good knowing I helped them a little bit along the way.

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The Four Agreements - Showering

A friend of mine gave me the book, "The Four Agreements" by Don Miguel Ruiz. I am finding it surprisingly fascinating and life changing.

First, let me share that I am not a good reader and I read slowly. I tend to get sleepy when I read an actual book. I love the concept of reading and the escape a book can provide. I enjoy audiobooks and go through them like crazy.

Second, I am not a consumer of "self-help" style books. Since I use books as an escape and I read slowly - I find that when I pick a book, I want it to take me away and not make me look inward. So, for me to pick up a paper back, self-help book was challenging.  I trusted my friend's advice, so I opened the book and began reading.

There are some fascinating concepts in this book. I will need to read it again, to fully digest all the information.

One part hit me at the right time and in the right frame of mind and has already changed things in my life. It is a little weird, but I thought I would share.

I was not a fan of showers. My hair dries slowly, and my skin is dry, so showering means planning.  I can't just take a quick shower and throw on clothes and go out. I need time to put on lotion and let it dry/sink into my skin. I need time to dry my hair. Showering is not a 3-minute process. I find that showering at night is best. But then I go out with friends/family and come home tired. The last thing I want to do is the routine of showering.

Then, I read this paragraph...

Doing your best is a great habit to have. I do my best in everything I do and feel. Doing my best has become a ritual in my life because I made the choice to make it a ritual. It's a belief like any other belief that I choose. I make everything a ritual, and I always do my best. Taking a shower is a ritual for me, and with that action I tell my body how much I love it. I feel and enjoy the water on my body. I do my best to fulfill the needs of my body. I do my best to give to my body and to receive what my body gives to me.

I had never thought about a shower being a way to tell my body I loved it. Showering as just a chore that I needed to check off my to-do list.  Now, I step into the shower with happiness. I realize that my body deserves this ritual. As I find more and more joy in showering, I am working to use this same thought process for my other "chores" such as brushing/flossing my teeth, cleaning my nails, shaving, etc.  

Embracing these routines as a way to show myself love is truly changing my daily life.

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Treat yourself as you would your best friend