Tuesday, August 16, 2022

Packing for a trip

I was enjoying dinner with a friend the other day.  We were discussing traveling.  I love traveling and we occasionally share stories about our travels.

I come from a family of travelers, and they have been teaching me tips and tricks for years.  

Some of the things I have learned it to:
  • Decorate my checked luggage so it can be easily identified on the airport carousel.
    • Decorate the back, as many times they dump them on the carousel back-side up.
  • Print a copy of your passport/important papers and put them in a different bag than your actual documents.  That will help if you lose anything.
  • Pack an extra garment in your carry-on in case your trip is delayed, and your luggage is not.
Then, my friend and I got to discussing a trick I really appreciate ... divide the packing between both checked bags, when possible.  She had never thought of this and was tickled to learn of the concept.

Basically - when traveling in pairs - I have been taught to:
  • Lay everything out on the bed that needs to go into luggage
  • Remove all the items that go into the carry-ons
  • Split each person's items into two piles
    • Try and ensure that each bag gets undergarments, pants/shorts, chargers, umbrellas, shoes, etc.  
    • We try and split liquids, medications, and anything else that can easily be split.  
  • We also try and split items in our carry-ons, just in case.  Things like money, lotions, snacks, etc.  
On the way back home - we do this for souvenirs and important things.  

We do our best to try and ensure that if the worst happens, it will not be a total loss.

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Wednesday, June 29, 2022

Political Ads & Things I Didn't Know

I saw a video news article on TV the other day. The station was explaining that they could not fact check political ads if the candidate was legally qualified to run for office and the ad was candidate sponsored. They could not refuse to sell ad space to a candidate, or a committee-to-elect even if they knew the ad was false or went against their station's policies.  

The gentleman who managed ads for the station stated that they are allowed to fact check medications, company claims, groups, etc.  They can refuse to air an ad if it goes against the station's policies or is deemed untrue. But the ability to manage political ads in the same manner is not allowed. He stated that the station is also required to give political ads the lowest price for the ad time.

I found this so surprising.  I had never realized this before. I did some research and found that this is true (FCC Political Programming and FEC Advertising and Disclaimers).

This made me wonder how we ever really know what is true and not true in any political ad we see on TV.  I figured I would try and put my google searching skills to work.  I fell down a deep rabbit hole trying to find a non-bias place to determine facts from fiction.

I hoped to find a few websites that would fact check political ads and quickly ran into issues.  Most received ratings of about 3 out of 5 stars. You really had to deep dive to figure out how they were funded and who was doing the fact checking.    

I switched gears and tried to find an easy-to-follow voting record list for politicians.  Again, I admit that I was not as lucky as I had hoped to be.  The sites that show this are somewhat convoluted.

I discerned that there was no perfect way to scientifically fact-check politicians using data or finding a non-bias source.  It takes a concerted effort to find the truth and determine what a politician is doing to help their constituents.  

While this blog did not pan out the way I had hoped it would when I started it, I now truly understand how easily voters get misinformed and confused. I comprehend that making a truly unbiased/informed decision was harder now than I ever expected, given the ads/website/blogs/tweets/etc.

Even though I didn't find a magic answer to share with you all, this fact-finding search did remind me (as I read through articles on politics) that no matter what your political views - all citizens should appreciate the right to vote and take the responsibility seriously.  Politicians can control our personal lives more than I think many of us appreciate. Doing some legwork to ensure you have investigated your candidates to the best of your ability is worth the effort.

Listed below are a few of the sites that I dug into, just as a reference for this blog. (I do not support the use of them or verify their information.)

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Thursday, June 2, 2022

Lessons Learned - Reorgs and Layoffs

I have been through various reorganizations and layoffs. I have been laid off.  I have been moved into new areas without getting a say-so in the change.  I have had executives laid off and had to report to new executives.  I have had to watch friends get moved around to teams they were not crazy about, and some were laid off.  I have had to listen to the calls while supervisors told people they were laid off or changing roles.  I have had to work on the HR reports during the reorgs, knowing how the checks in a column would change people's lives.  I have had to work with executives to determine where the checks should go.

Trust me, there is nothing easy about any of it.  Through all the different phases I have experienced, I have learned a lot.
  • It is very hard being the one affected. You feel you have done something wrong and are being punished. It is hard to understand how the "higher ups" could do this to you. 
  • It is equally as hard to be the one checking the columns that change people's lives. The "higher ups" know that humans with families, bills and responsibilities are behind each change. They realize that some people really love what they do and took the job because they wanted to work with so-n-so, but that is no longer an option.  The people making decisions feel guilt, frustration and anger along with the affected people.  
  • If you are "lucky" enough to stay where you are, you suffer from survivor's guilt. You wonder why good people were let go or moved to other areas and you are staying where you are.  You worry they will despise you.
  • The uncertainty and stress of it all is unbearable at times. It is hard to stay positive and not get dragged down by overthinking the possibilities.
  • There is never a good time or way to process these changes.  If they happen too fast, you feel unprepared.  You feel they rushed the process, and it won't have been truly thought out correctly.  If the changes happen too slowly, you feel the company is hiding something or leaving you in limbo. If they let you know the change in the morning, it hurts because you just started working that day.  If they contact you at the end of the day, you wonder why they made you work all day.  If they immediately let you go, you wonder why they didn't trust you to finish up important work.  If they ask you to stay to complete work, you wonder why they are making you stay.  If it is before a holiday, it ruins your holiday.  If it is after, you feel they should have done it before so you could have known going into the holiday.  It is truly a no-win situation.
I have also learned some positive and helpful lessons - that I use to survive all kinds of life's "tragedies", not just work changes.
  • Stay positive. People will notice and respect you for it.
  • Don't get involved in the gossip.  It will add extra stress to your world that will not help you.
  • Don't create a horrible story in your head to fill the void of information.
  • Make a game plan. You will feel better having a plan A, B, and C.
  • Take stock of what is important.  If staying is a goal, then work to make that happen. If changing teams would help, try and position yourself to get to that new team.  If leaving would give you peace, ensure that people realize you wish to go. 
  • Keep busy. Look for other projects, people or teams to help.  Keeping busy makes the waiting a lot less burdensome.  
  • If you forced to change in some manner, realize that the new adventure coming your way will probably be better than where you were.  Embrace the change and learn from it.  
  • Have a rainy-day fund.  The peace of mind knowing that money will not be an extra burden during trying times is a godsend.
  • Engage your social circle to help keep you grounded.  The distraction of their lives also helps remind you that other things are going on around you and it is not all about the change you are experiencing.
  • Keep your ego out of it.  Change is not a personal attack.
Business is business and change is change.  Almost all businesses will reorg and do layoffs at some time or another. Everyone's life faces unexpected changes.  There is no way to escape change, but there is a way to come out the other side in a better place.

I have really only had one change that I felt was truly "wrong". So, I used my plan B and C and made a change that suited me better.  It worked out beautifully. The others changes all seemed hard or somewhat wrong at the time but ended up being positive new adventures. I have been very blessed and I plan to continue to be blessed when the next change comes my way.

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Tuesday, May 17, 2022

Be a tourist in your own town

I enjoy vacations and traveling.  I love getting to see new sites and get my passport stamped. John and I find it thrilling to explore new cities and engage in new adventures.  

Honestly though, we seldom really play tourist in our own town.  Shame on us.  

St Louis and the surrounding area has so much to offer.  We do the occasional zoo day, see a play, walk around Main Street St Charles or visit a new restaurant. But overall, we don't really do all the great touristy things available in our area.  We haven't been the aquarium, some of the wineries, the History Museum, etc.

This year, John suggested that we try and do more tourist things in our town. I am pleased to share that we have already made some progress.  We walked around the Central West End, saw the Van Gogh exhibit, strolled the Delmar Loop and visited the Art Museum. 

We plan to continue the trend and see a lot more of what our city/county has to offer. It is exciting and we are enjoying not only time together but seeing and learning new things.

Added bonus: spending money, locally, can only help the town I call home.

I hope that you are finding a way to enjoy the town you live in.  If you are not taking advantage of your local attractions and helping support the place you call home, I hope this makes you think of doing more around your town.

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Tuesday, April 19, 2022

Lessons learned from my broken wrist

At the end of March, I fell getting out of the hotel shower while on vacation. I broke my wrist. Luckily, it was my left wrist, as I am right-handed. I always sort of figured my left hand was not as "important". I have been amazed at how many things in this life require two hands.  

I have learned so much during the start of this process.
  • Clothing has way too many buttons, zippers, snaps, hooks and laces.  Thank God yoga pants are acceptable these days.
  • Laundry is hard to hang up, fold and put away. And laundry baskets are impossible to carry down the stairs. Though dropping the basket down the stairs is easy (but freaks out the cats).
  • Tucking socks together to put them in the drawer is tough, but unrolling them and putting them on is even tougher.
  • Touch typing is really slow and requires a lot of thought. Apparently as a touch typist, I let my mind/hands just do their job without really thinking of capitalization, spelling, and punctuation. Just typing this blog has taken about ten times the amount of time I would normally spend crafting a post.
  • The car's turn signal should be an Alexa option ("Alexa turn on right blinker").
  • Lunch salads are impossible. Restaurants serve a ton of food that requires a knife and fork combo. Luckily, the appetizer menus have finger foods. My diet is suffering.
  • Short hair is much easier to care for than long hair. But, still tough to color.
  • Clipping and filing my fingernails seems so scary I am avoiding it for now and just letting my nails get longer and longer.
  • Twisting off beverage lids/caps has me either begging for help, or drinking just water.
  • And, last but not least, don't even get me started with going to the bathroom.
Overall, I am finding creative ways to do a lot of things. My husband, friends and family are all super supportive and help when I need it.  Yes, this sucks, but it could have been so much worse.  I feel blessed in ways I never thought of.

I truly have taken my left hand totally for granted.  I will never do that again!

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Tuesday, April 12, 2022

Who is my client?

When I worked as a waitress, it was easy to know who my client was... it was the patrons.  I lived off tips, so if they were happy, they tipped better, and I made more money.  Certainly, when I owned my own company, customers were my clients.

When I started working in offices, it became much harder to know who my client was.  A few of my first temp jobs were for sales companies.  We all worked to help the salesmen make more sales.  The clients were our customers.  Pleasing them was our main goal. So, that too was pretty easy.  

As I worked for different industries and got further into my admin career, the question of who my client was became harder to understand.  Usually, it was my boss/manager - the one that approved my pay increases and promotions.  Yet, this seemed harder and harder to decipher as my role became office manager / assistant / chief of staff / girl Friday.   Suddenly, I had a lot of bosses and no true "client".  

As I was cross-training to replace a lady who was retiring, she informed me that everyone in the office was my client. If they were all successful in their various roles, then I was successful, and the company was more successful.  It all trickled up and down.  She taught me how to look at them all equally, and prioritize based not only on title, but on necessity and urgency.  It was okay to tell your boss you needed to push their work to another day, if a co-worker's request was more urgent or would affect a greater number of people.   These concepts were very eye opening for me.

Now, I look at everyone as my client. My boss, her boss, their assistants, their project managers, the people in facilities that help keep us all safe and sound, along with all the other people that reach out to me each day.  I do my very best to treat them all as my most important customer - for when the prosper, I can feel good knowing I helped them a little bit along the way.

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Monday, March 14, 2022

The Four Agreements - Showering

A friend of mine gave me the book, "The Four Agreements" by Don Miguel Ruiz. I am finding it surprisingly fascinating and life changing.

First, let me share that I am not a good reader and I read slowly. I tend to get sleepy when I read an actual book. I love the concept of reading and the escape a book can provide. I enjoy audiobooks and go through them like crazy.

Second, I am not a consumer of "self-help" style books. Since I use books as an escape and I read slowly - I find that when I pick a book, I want it to take me away and not make me look inward. So, for me to pick up a paper back, self-help book was challenging.  I trusted my friend's advice, so I opened the book and began reading.

There are some fascinating concepts in this book. I will need to read it again, to fully digest all the information.

One part hit me at the right time and in the right frame of mind and has already changed things in my life. It is a little weird, but I thought I would share.

I was not a fan of showers. My hair dries slowly, and my skin is dry, so showering means planning.  I can't just take a quick shower and throw on clothes and go out. I need time to put on lotion and let it dry/sink into my skin. I need time to dry my hair. Showering is not a 3-minute process. I find that showering at night is best. But then I go out with friends/family and come home tired. The last thing I want to do is the routine of showering.

Then, I read this paragraph...

Doing your best is a great habit to have. I do my best in everything I do and feel. Doing my best has become a ritual in my life because I made the choice to make it a ritual. It's a belief like any other belief that I choose. I make everything a ritual, and I always do my best. Taking a shower is a ritual for me, and with that action I tell my body how much I love it. I feel and enjoy the water on my body. I do my best to fulfill the needs of my body. I do my best to give to my body and to receive what my body gives to me.

I had never thought about a shower being a way to tell my body I loved it. Showering as just a chore that I needed to check off my to-do list.  Now, I step into the shower with happiness. I realize that my body deserves this ritual. As I find more and more joy in showering, I am working to use this same thought process for my other "chores" such as brushing/flossing my teeth, cleaning my nails, shaving, etc.  

Embracing these routines as a way to show myself love is truly changing my daily life.

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Tuesday, February 22, 2022

Lesson Learned - Breakfast Casserole

Many years ago, a co-worker would bring in his delicious egg casserole for special occasions.  He lived close enough that it would still be warm when he arrived.  It was such a fantastic treat.  He would put in eggs, mushrooms, sour creme, sausage, cheese and sometimes some other ingredients for us.   

When I wanted to try and cut out carbs/fat (and stop eating pop-tarts for breakfast) ... he recommended that I make a smaller version of his casserole.  He informed me that I could cut it into squares and then heat up a square every morning for breakfast.  

Fast forward to now.  I still make a breakfast casserole.  I bake it in a square glass dish.  I cut it into blocks.  I slide those blocks into slices each and put them into a Tupperware container that works perfectly.  Each morning I pull out some slices and microwave them in a smaller Tupperware container.  It works well and I get a nice hot breakfast each morning, without a whole lot of fuss.   

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Monday, February 7, 2022

What you hear is not what I hear

Many of us played the game "telephone" as a kid (or as a communication exercise at work).  Telephone is where you tell someone a statement, and everyone has to pass it along to another person.  The last person in the chain has to share what they heard.  The beginning statement and the ending statement are never the same. We each hear things different and then put our spin on it when we pass it along.  

Some classes I have taken over the years have also shown me how my life experiences change the way I process things each and every day.  I put my spin on what I see and what I do, based on what I have seen and done in the past.

The other day I was watching a film called "Flipped".  It is a romcom based on two grade school kids and how they view their relationship.  It was really interesting the way they showed how each person's view of the exact same event.  

This movie reminded me how important it is to remember (every day) that:
  • The way people share information with me depends on how they interpreted the original information.  
  • The way I hear or process information, is based on my past experiences. 
  • If I share the information, the people I share it with will bring their biases and perspectives to what I share.
  • You never know the way people's pasts are affecting the way they are responding to you.  
  • If you see someone acting "out of character" in a certain situation, remember that something in their past might be causing the issue; or, something in your past may be affecting the way you are reading the situation.  
No matter what, if you feel that someone might not understand what you are saying or why you are acting the way you are acting, discuss it with them.  Ensure what you are explaining is really what they are hearing and understanding. Be aware that the way you think you are acting might be seen differently by everyone around you.

In all things, give each other grace.  Everyone's past is different, and we all have different biases and beliefs that we bring to everything we hear, say and do.

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Tuesday, January 18, 2022

Lessons Learned - Dinner Prep

A few years ago my sister shared a secret with me about dinner prep.  Since you all enjoyed my tip on butter patties, I thought I would share a tip on hamburger for dinner prep.

I usually bought four pounds of hamburger at a time.  I would divide it into single pounds, wrap each in tinfoil and freeze them.  When we were making something with hamburger, I would need to remember to thaw out the burger and then either make patties or fry it for something like tacos or pizza.  

One weekend, I had my sister and her husband over for pizza. I was frying the ground beef when they arrived.  She asked why I didn't just fry up a few pounds at a time, and then freeze the frozen pounds in freezer bags.   

Wow!  

Sort of like the butter suggestion... I was stunned I had never thought of it.

Now, I take the four pounds and fry up three pounds - or even all of it.  I split the fried hamburger up and freeze each individually. I have a large frying pan with deep sides, which allows me to do this all at one time. It makes it so easy at dinner time.  If we decide to make tacos, I defrost the fried beef and quickly make tacos.   

It really is a true time saver and makes throwing together that meal after a long day at work, much easier.  Thanks sis!

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Monday, January 3, 2022

Lessons Learned - 2021

Another year on the books. Wow... how time flies.  

There have certainly been some frustrating and annoying issues around 2021.  Covid, no vacation, politics, cancelations of events, etc.  Yet, overall, I feel extremely blessed for 2021. I was lucky enough to land a promotion and join a new team. I was able to visit more with family and friends. I was able to throw some parties and enjoy my family and friends for the holidays. I bought a car and some furniture.  John continues to enjoy his job and joined another band.  My family and friends stayed out of the hospitals and generally healthy. Even the cats stayed healthy and playful.

I looked over the Lessons Learned 2021 blog to see if anything changed. I realized even more how very blessed I have been in 2021.  

From my 2020 recap... "Here are the things I learned in 2020 (in no particular order)."

  • Friends and family are essential.   Even more true in 2021.
    • Getting to touch base with my family and friends took on a special meaning this year. I have always tried to appreciate my friends and family, but this year, I realized just how truly important they are to me. I am grateful for any time I get to spend with them, any note I receive from them, or any time I get to talk to them. Not seeing them all regularly made our get-togethers even better.
  • Being outside is awesome.   Still extremely true in 2021.
    • I have always needed fresh air and sunshine. This year, I realized that the more I got of both, the better I felt. I learned to embrace long walks in the park. I loved my time on the patio with John. Just taking a drive with the top down made me smile.
  • People are clever.   Still true and now I have found even more fun videos to share.
    • I was never a big YouTube watcher, but this year, I loved watching the clever skits and songs people created to help make us smile. Cat videos, squirrel obstacle courses, mashups, and the Holderness Family kept my mood positive. There were also so many fantastic websites showing pictures, memes, and sharing knowledge.
  • I am okay.  Luckily, still true.  I learned to color again, painted my critters and finished embordering my blue jean jacket.
    • Normally, I kept so busy that I never really had to spend much time with myself. This year, I have learned to spend a lot of time with myself. I am no substitute for dinner with a good friend or close family member... but I am decent company.  I can sit alone and not go crazy. I can be reflective and stay positive. I can complete puzzles and get joy from the accomplishment. I can read on the porch or just watch the birds at the feeders.  I can find joy in the peacefulness.
  • A good job and co-workers should be celebrated. Even more true this year.  My co-workers and teams have really helped my mental health and I am enjoying learning so many new things.
    • I am always grateful when I am lucky enough to have a good job and kind co-workers, but this year has really sharpened my thankfulness. Early in the pandemic, I feared for my job. My co-workers and supervisors gave me peace of mind and showed me that they appreciated me. They found a way to keep me on staff. It meant so much to me. I appreciate having something to do to fill my days. And, the support I receive from all of my teammates helps make the days brighter.
  • My cats fill me with joy.  Still extremely true.  In fact, they are becoming so used to us being home all the time, that when we actually spent a day walking Main Street or at a festival, they seemed to actually miss us.
    • It is almost like our cats know we were struggling this year. They seem more playful. They seem more willing to sit on my lap and just enjoy the quiet with me. They serve as good co-workers and spend their days sleeping in my office. 
I hope you regard 2021 as a positive year and can find many reasons to feel blessed. And, I truly hope that 2022 is an even better year for everyone.

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Packing for a trip

I was enjoying dinner with a friend the other day.  We were discussing traveling.  I love traveling and we occasionally share stories about ...